From The Find-Your-Own-PrOn-In-Future Dept.

So there I was on Friday afternoon, struggling with the ability to breathe; wondering whether there would ever be a time again when there wouldn't be blood in my phlegm and contemplating the fact that the last remaining bit of food in the house was a can of flaked tuna in brine which I had to toss a coin with the cat for - when one of my online chums decided I didn't have enough to occupy my time.

It seems Graybo was sufficiently intrigued by a review in The Daily Telegraph of an Alicia Keys concert in Nottingham (remember Alicia? She was last year's Norah Jones) that he wanted a picture from the said gig. I can't be arsed to link to the Telegraph review but the basic upshot (using my John Smith No-Nonsense Translator) was 'Stuff the gig! Look at the set on that!'

Now aside from the fact that Mike The Troubled Diva had actually been to the bleeding gig and hadn't took any pics, it apparently came down to me to come up with the goods. My fanbase can be soooo demanding at times, you know. So I sighed and I coughed and I spluttered and...well, to cut a short story even briefer, I found bugger all. But she does look rather lovely in the portrait to your left so that'll have to do for the time being, I'm afraid, Mistah Spencer...