She's public school yet she's *street*. But that didn't stop glamorous Ninja warrior Robyn Wilder from having her record bag stolen in London on Wednesday night. Complete with her wallet, mobile phone and reading glasses, amongst other personal belongings. Parallax View deeply emphathises - it's the theft of the glasses that is so infuriating. Difficult and expensive to replace, but completely fucking useless to anyone else.

I'd give her a hug but as she's entirely constructed from the finest porcelain from across the world I'm afraid I'd grind her to dust (oo-er missus). So to the relief of just about everyone, a virtual hug it'll have to be...