Monday, September 29, 2003

Oh dear, there's a bad taste in my mouth and it appears to have infected my blog

Rumours are rife (rife, I tell you) concerning the identities of the eight Premiership footballers under suspicion of alleged rape at a West London hotel over the weekend. Indeed, I'm getting text messages from people demanding to know the truth about the matter. Well, to paraphrase Monsieur Wenger, I deed not see it, so I can't help. But if the poor (alleged) victim was unfortunate enough to look like Ruud Van Nistelrooy I know where my finger's pointing.

One thing I can exclusively reveal is that the players of Tottenham Hotspur are in the clear. As one long-suffering regular at White Hart Lame has pointed out, they couldn't score in a gangbang.

Meanwhile Vicky has written in to advise me there were four, not three, hot chicks pretending to play guitar behind the late, grating Robert Palmer in his video for Addicted To Love (the BBC 'cut the minging one out' of their online screen cap according to our Vic). Strangely, in yesterday's News of The World they made it five. Perhaps one of the most memorable videos of the 80s wasn't quite as memorable as we thought it was, eh?


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