Down and Out In London?

Troubled pop strumpets Girls Aloud celebrated the fact that No Good Advice has earned this week's accolade of Parallax View Single Of The Week by dressing up as schoolgirls over the weekend. Judging by the picture to your left of Nicola Roberts (taken from The Sun) maybe they should have included a dunce's cap in her outfit, as she clearly brought up the rear in spelling class.

Belated birthday wishes to green-fingered Graybo the blogging world's answer to Alan Titchmarsh. And I turn my back for a few days, and Anja has only gone and got her 'boobies' out. The things she'll do to get a link from me!

Bit late with this one, but if you haven't seen it already the final trailer for Ang Lee's The Hulk is now online.

My local team Telford United have finally announced their new boss. Amidst feverish town rumours of an imminent big name like Steve Cotterill or Jan Molby the club have incredibly plumped instead for an unknown 57-year-old Mick Jones. Not an appointment likely to generate much excitement amongst the townfolk, methinks.

While we're on the subject of football (if you must) thanks to Arseblogger and Ben for their commiserations over the relegation of my beloved West Ham. But there were no tears before bedtime in the Parallax View household - after all, I foretold our fate as far back as last November.

Talking of predictions, have a gander at mine at the eve of the season. I got the top two right, five of the first six (including surprise package Blackburn) and two of the three relegated sides. No prizes for guessing which one I got wrong, with The Hammers taking Fulham's rightful place in oblivion.

But anyway last season is history now. West Ham are now in a division which is actually a competition rather than a promotional puff-piece for Sky Sports and Manchester United, and ticket prices are being reduced to 20%. We'll find out how many of our players love the shirt and the rest of them can fuck off as long as the price is right by us.

The most bizarre moment of the weekend just gone was Brum manager Steve Bruce's amazing outburst that he'd been waiting eight years to send West Ham down, since the day the Hammers had the temerity not to roll over and die and let his team Man U win the title all those years back. Brucey boy, let's face facts, the Mancs have such a massive financial advantage over the rest of us we ALL hated you, every one of us, deal with it. Shame you had to reveal you're just as bitter and twisted as your wonky-nosed face...

And to paraphrase Nicola Roberts: Relegation? Botherd!